


What I've Learned, All I've Loved

by Gaynin



Series: Supernatural 2019 7-Day Ficlet Challenge [5]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Cas' Birth, Fluff, Found Family, Gen, Heaven, Lucifer mentioned - Freeform, Other Angels Mentioned, The Archangels Mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-12
Updated: 2019-12-12
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:14:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21763579
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gaynin/pseuds/Gaynin
Summary: Cas was born in heaven but was found on earth.
Relationships: Castiel & Dean Winchester & Sam Winchester
Series: Supernatural 2019 7-Day Ficlet Challenge [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1568527
Comments: 6
Kudos: 18





	What I've Learned, All I've Loved

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TheCokeworthCauldrons](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheCokeworthCauldrons/gifts).



Castiel remembers every moment of his existence. Every instance and how it played out, including his birth.

He was born in heaven in a single moment so long ago. Blossomed into existence surrounded by millions of beings so bright and magnificent. So massive in scope that he felt small and tender in comparison.

They cradled him, welcomed him, showered him in praise. Told him he was beautiful. Made him feel warm and alive. They sang to him, sang praises to the father that made him. They each approached him with gentle caresses and cooing words of affection. “Welcome brother,” they said, “the glory and the kingdom of God the father is your home and he loves you.”

And Castiel loved them, how he loved them. Each and every one perfect. Each and every one beautiful. He learned their names, learned all their names before he even learned his own. 

“Castiel,” they had said “an angel of the Lord.”

Far above them beings too colossal and still to have registered as anything but a place in and of themselves finally shifted and spoke of God’s will. Of his need for Castiel to always remain obedient lest he be cast out of his home, and away from his siblings. It was the first time Castiel felt fear and he agreed without question, speaking words he’d later hear from every angel born after, an oath engraved in their very essence.

Satisfied, the beings shifted again and Castiel reached out to be held by them too, only to feel his first sense of the cold as they turned away, leaving his brethren to tend to him.

He learned their names too. Lucifer, Michael, Raphel, and Gabriel. Learned to think of them as more important than himself, but never more important than God. No one is or ever has been.

Castiel asked when he would meet his father and listened as his sibling’s amusement rang out like bells, big and small. He learned not to ask again.

He learned he liked to be close with his siblings, always touching, always near and often held.

He learned to love God through his creations. Enjoyed watching as birds flew together in swirling patterns, as otters floated in pairs huddled for warmth, as ants marched in unison to build their towers.

He enjoyed most when children would play among green grass. When friends would lay upon hills and gaze lovingly at the sky. When lovers would kiss near bodies of water that made them glow. When families built fires and gathered around them and laughed and sang.

Humanity had been the thing that nearly broke his home. And yet he loved it so.

~~~

Cas woke up stiff and alone in the back seat of the Impala.

He was near a stream, of that he was sure. The car was parked off the road, in the grass near a tree, he was also sure of that.

What he was unsure of was where the Winchesters were.

Birds twittered in the tree above and Castiel thought to himself _'there must be a nest.'_

He also thought of the pros and cons of moving, the car door not being the most comfortable place for his head to rest.

Suddenly the door jerked open.

“Morning, Sunshine!” he heard in Dean’s voice as his head fell mere inches, but just enough to jar him.

He righted himself and looked out the car door as the brothers towered over him.

“We got you an omelet.” Sam said sounding a bit apologetic.

“That’s not the best part, tell him the best part.” Dean said, grin on his face.

“It’s uh... burger omelet.”

“It’s a burger omelet! Can you believe they make those?” Dean all but throws the brown paper bag in Cas’ lap “I don’t know if I’d call it a burger though, it doesn’t come on a pair of buns.” he shrugged.

Cas opened the bag and saw the aforementioned Burger Omelet in a clear plastic container under packets of ketchup beside a disposable fork and knife.

“.... Thank you.” he said, he had learned it was polite to say so even in situations like this, where he wasn’t sure if he was being mocked or not.

The brothers climbed in the front seat after asking if Cas needed to “take a leak”, he didn’t so they drove back to the road.

“So we interviewed a local by the name of Darlene Meyers,” Sam said pulling out a notepad and handing it to Cas, “Says there have been strange things going on in her house and with her family. Dean thinks we’re dealing with a poltergeist but I think it could be demonic possession. What do you think Cas?” he asked tone professional but lips drawing in on themselves, like an anxious child.

Cas reviewed the notes and hummed “It may, in fact, be a poltergeist.”

“Ha!” came from the driver’s seat.

“But Dean! I mean- Cas! I think it would make more sense if-” Cas barely listened to the rest as he came to a realization about himself.

Cas can remember every moment of his existence. Every instance and how it went, including his time with the Winchesters.

He remembers every time Sam had ever pleaded his case with Dean and how similar in tone it is to how he pleads with Cas.

Remembers every time Dean had ever gotten something for Cas that he really didn’t need to.

Remembers every vote of confidence from Sam, every smile from Dean.

Every time the brothers chuckled at something he did or said. Every time they laid a warm hand on him in affection or held him in an embrace.

Remembers how each act of love made him feel warm, and alive.

Cas remembers it all but it was only in that moment that the bits in pieces added up to something greater than the sum of its parts.

Castiel, angel of the lord, born in heaven and made perfect by God’s hand,

was a Winchester.

Castiel had fallen in love. Not just with God's creations but with what it was like to be

human.

And how he loved it so.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to TheCokeworthSnapes for the prompt!  
> This is day 5 of my self imposed 7-day ficlet challenge!  
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
